5 days down, 54 -more to go! I survived my first week back to work. Surprisingly, it feels more like a job rather than my life now. I still love my kids (well, most of them) and what I do (despite being overwhelmed with deadlines, data and assessments) but now I have more important things to attend to when 3:15 rolls around. The days go back quick, and when that clock strikes 3:15 - I'm packing up and gone -- whether my desk is cleaned, papers are copied or board erased -- because I know my little man is waiting for me!
I survived my first day back without too bad of a meltdown. Putting him to bed Sunday night was the hardest. The tears kept coming while he smiled and talked to me as he touched my face, like he was saying it's okay mom, I know you have to do this and don't want to, but I will be okay. Then of course, of all nights, we have storms like none other. Those who know me well understand my deep fear of storms. While Cohen slept like a baby once (all night may I add), mama slept like crap, awakened by every weather alert text sent to my phone and flash of lightning. And when my alarm went off at 5:25, I was saddend with the thought that my maternity leave was over and it was back to the real world I go. My mornings are now consumed with pumping and tip toeing around in the dark, making sure I don't awake the baby. Who knew a baby would add a good 25 minutes to my morning routine - and he's not even up yet! But that last kiss to my little man broke my heart, creating a surge of tears that consumed half of my drive to work. The day went quick, the kids were happy to see me and I only had to make 1 parent phone call because of bad behavior. And 3:15 couldn't have come fast enough!!
Cohen really seems to be comfortable at his sitter's house - and I know they really love him. She is always holding him and kissing him while her husband has seemed to have bonded quite well with my stinker as well. But this week wouldn't be complete without a sick baby on our hands - and as they tell me, welcome to daycare!
Being a working mom is a real emotional roller coaster - one day I think I'm fine while the next I am crying to my mom because I miss my little man so much. I'm working on Kurtis now to see if he'll let me job share next year with another teacher who asked if I would be interested - something that I'd really love to do if it allowed me more time with stinker! However, I think I'll survive the rest of this year at least - only 54 more days left...but who's counting?
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